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Bad Dreams

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The quicker I write down my dreams the better a job I think I do. For instance, I've already forgotten which of these dreams happened first and which happened second. They were both bizarre and a littl disturbing.

Warning: Fears of Abandoment is full of emo and weird magical thought and The City That Never Was is full of Transmetropolitan, which is to say freaky ass drugs, sex, and violence. Transmet is like if Naked Lunch was a comic book with an actual protagonist and he was a journalist and not gay. But the vagina's still had scary teeth.


The sky was steely grey and high as a cathedral roof, hanging stepped away from the situation and like a plate of metal over the world instead of, you know, a sky. It was raining, but it felt like it should be as if that might make it better.

There was no one around at all, just me and my three bags on the curb at dusk in front of Dulles for some reason, most likely because I have no idea what Reagan National looks like. Anyways, the inside of the airport was dark and I got the feeling that it was those really, really early hours of the morning that deserve to be called HOLY SHIT 4 am and whatnot. 3 am is the witching hour, it occured to me, and the first half hour is for good magic and the second is for bad magic and I craned my head, but I could walk to look at the clock because I'd lost my crutches and I couldn't leave my bags unattended because someone might steal them. And I squinted and squinted and it was 3:31 am.

I shrugged and just accepted that there was nothing I could do and then the dream was over.




I don't know how I knew it was The City from Transmet, but I did and I zipped around and I peeked into people's lives, especially transient's lives.

First there was, it must have been Laxrene. She had antenne, real antenne and the lower half of her body was alien because she was a transient. She was working as a dominatrix and she got more money because alot of transients don't want to be touched by humans, but alot of humans want to stick it in alien pussy. It was good money. The receptionist got a phone call and was all giggly and weird at her and Laxrene decided she'd finally started huffing hairspray between calls. But, no, actually it was Marluxia plotting to surprise her at work, which was nice and my dream went into a brief pronographic interlude and then they went to lunch. Marluxia was transient on his left side, but he had a very full mouth despite it and he never bothered to cover his alien eye. I remember he told her "Just wait, I'll get a promotion and we'll have the therapy and we'll both retire to the Mountain." and I thought they were holding hands, but she was picking at his hang nails and he was looking for chips in her manicure. It was black with yellow french tips.

Then there was Xemnas and the original six. They were all high up officials in the Church of Fred Christ, the Church of the Transients. They were old, but the alien genes kept them looking just as young as when they'd converted. They wanted to be human, deep down, but not until they'd made a difference for transients. Like queer activists who'd really rather be straight despite all their own work. Xemnas was fucking with Fred Christ's head, which really is not a hard thing to do, and basically had plans to take over the Church with his death.

Spider Jerusalem was sleeping as Xigbar passed by on his long, long way home. He took the scenic route and that took him deep into the worst parts of Angels 8. And he walked into this aparment building without even ringing himself in and Demyx was drugged up listening to music on the floor. See, the music of the hip transient kids is so slowed down you have to take drugs that nearly make you comatose in order to hear it. Demyx really loved the music, but he didn't like the drugs and he didn't like being slowed down so whenever he wasn't slowed he was always really hyper. Xigbar liked him either way, but he only ever got laid when Demyx was slowed. Axel was there using Space as well and so were, actually, alot of people. Considering that Space is basically a slower down of your perception of time I don't think I have to tell you who their dealer was. He is Sir Not Appearing in This Dream Sequence. Anyways. Laxrene was there, but she'd already gotten over her take of Space and was waiting for Marluxia to come back to reality and fucking with the other people and was smoking Carcinoma Angels with Xigbar, who covered his alien eye with the patch and whose scars were grey/white alien skin. Laxrene was really grossed out by what Space did to Demyx's orgasm and she told a story about when Axel was high off his mind on Queen Ant and deep tissue muscle relaxants and she put a corset on him that was so tight she could put her single hand around his waist.

Then this kid in the corner, Roxas obviously, threw something at her and waited impatiently while the few Space users did whatever it is you do on Space, whatever you do in the waiting area of a couple people's brains. And when Xigbar said something or other about Axel's hair Roxas just got pissed off and left him there.

We followed Roxas who had to fight through Xemnas and some loyal Church followers, drug pushers, advertisements, transient prostitutes, and who had a brief and frightening interlude with Spider Jerusalem harassing him before he got home. Axel showed up a few days later looking pissed off and molested, but he was so glad to be home and to see that nothing bad had happened to Roxas while he was away. Roxas asked him why he'd be so worried and then they were really quiet for a while.

Then Spider showed up again and he claimed that the Transient church was calling Roxas a messiah because he apparently had a complete alien genome and a complete human one and Spider and Axel got into a fight and Spider was really, really, really pissed off that he got beat by a spacer but then Demyx and Laxrene and Marluxia showed up and said the dealer had gotten some cool shit and didn't he always want to try Hitler's Urine and who was - was that Spider Jerusalem what is he doing here and Spider didn't stick around long enough to learn that Laxrene totally would have slept with him. At least he had his story.

Also, holy shit you guys I'm posting!
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Worked Up So Sexual - The Faint
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